Days 8-10

I know I know I am more than a day late and a dollar short. LOL! Oh well!

Sunday we (A and I) spent all day diving back home. It seemed to take longer getting back home although I have to say we  made it in exactly 8 hours. Which is good and had we not had to stop we would have made it in about 7 1/2 hours. Traveling with the diet is a little tricky as you have to make sure you have snacks you can eat and next time I go on any road trip it will be with the protien bars so that I wont have to be stopping as often just to eat a snack. We packed veggies and fruit and peanut butter and laughing cow cheese all of which is hard to eat while driving. (please dont attempt). We finaly made it home and I was pooped especially after unloading the whole rental car which had to be returned by 8 the next morning. So I didnt actually get a third meal that day and just choose a healthier snack I also didnt get all my water in which I think didnt help my weight loss be as much as it could have been a little more.

Monday was more back to normal got all my meals in all my teas and all my pills. I also weighed in and drumroll please........ I LOST 10 LBS. I was very happy with that.

Tuesday was crazy again I had my niece and was on my way to take her home about an hour before I had to take my second meal I thought I would be home close to the time to eat so I didnt take my lunch with me. That was a mistake I didnt get home for 3 hours and it was closer to the time I should have been eating dinner. Had I done my lunch (shake) at that time it would have been 10-11 oclock before we would be eating dinner and I couldnt do that to the hubs. So I ate my dinner for my lunch and than should have had another shake but I was so tired I ended up in bed before 930. So I missed my third meal again last night. Gotta do better today.

Day 6 and Day 7

Disclaimer: This blog is my health and wellness over all in all areas blog. What you read below might be considered tmi, so if the idea of certain bodily functions bother you dont read any further.



I know I know I skipped a day but only in blog world. The diet is still on track! Yesterday "A" (roommate) and I drove to Savannah Georgia to see my best friend (also a friend of hers) and her new baby. He is absolutely adorable will have to post the pics when I get home. I truly have enjoyed mhurriedy time.

Day 6:

Started out crazy and hurried so I didnt get my meals exactly like clock work. "A" and I get started on the road around 11 o'clock yesterday morning and was planning on being in savannah around no later than 9 that night. Well lo and behold we get to about an hour from Jacksonville and we pull off to a rest area and as we are pulling into a parking spot the rental car died on us! No! I am not kidding, Yes, I am serious. So I called about 5 local (within an hours drive) rental offices and I was able to trade cars in at the Jacksonville airport. So now we are about an hour and half behind. We finally back on the road and make it without any more incidents the rest of the way. (Hopefully we will make it all the way home tomorrow without incident) We did very good on the plan and even managed to eat good for dinner. We split the chicken bella and each at a salad bar at Ruby Tuesdays. The only thing that I was behind on was a glass of my tea and some water.


Day 7:

Today we were busy busy busy, helping "M" (afore mentioned best friend) clean her and her hubby's apartment. I also got lots of baby duty so meals were kinda off kilter again. For dinner tonight though we had ribs with kraut and spaghetti squash and aspargus. It was yummy and quite filling. Found some new peanut butter that I will be buying. Smu.ck.ers all natural.

Now to my tmi, I have very very irregular periods dont really know why they became that way a couple of years ago. I think one of the positive side effects of losing weight is that it will help regulate my periods again. Well its been about 10 months since I have had one and guess what happens the weekend I go out of town and dont plain on anything happening and again remember its been 10 months. Well I started my period at sams club today. Thank God it was light and I was able to make it until we got back from sams and publix. Joy, Joy! Hey at least it happened while I was out of town away from the hubs. LOL!

Well I know this was short and sweet but with traveling its gotta be. I will post more Monday after my schedule resumes.

Day 5

I am giving myself a pat on the back for today. I have excercised for 5 days in a row (YAY ME!) and I have also been blogging everyday this week. I did blog yesterday but the ipad did something crazy so instead of posting my blog it saved it as a draft and I was to tired to try and find it.

Today was a so-so day for me. Mostly battling things in my head. The main thing is fear, and specifically fear of failure. It started when I put my jeans back on today and they seemed a little harder to do, not really sure why havent changed anything back, but that just put me in a tailspin of internally freaking out. I mean like thinking I have messed up my jeans are a little tighter today instead of looser, why are they? Am I doing something wrong? Will I ever beat this battle? One thing though that I am begining to truly understand though is that no matter who you are you cant just eat however you like and not have the side effects that a healthy lifestyle is all about choices whether you eat that cupcake or the cup of broccoli, whether you make the right or wrong choice. It is also more than a diet yo-yo. Its more than "Well, I ran an extra mile today so that pizza or cake or _______ (insert your own desire) wont count or because I ran that extra mile I deserve it" No this is not just some attempt to lose 60, 70, 80, 100, or more lbs for me this is a complete life overhaul. This is no more excuses and conquering the mind games that have kept me captive its also having the support in my life on the days that I feel fear or have a great day or so-so day that can tell me you can do it, or hey this might work, or even call me out on what I am doing. Who knows how long this initial journey will be, to get to my healthy weight, but I know that this is a lifelong journey of always making the healthy choices to choose excercise over tv, and carrots over cake, and water over soda. While it isnt always going to be easy or fun it is so worth the end results and thats more than being skinny. Some of the rewards I wont even know for a couple or so years.

I have been reading a friend of mine's blog about her journey and struggle to weight loss and a healthy lifestyle and here are a couple of blog entries that I read today that encouraged me.

I've never come this close to giving up

Easter Candy is the Spawn of Satan

Day 3

Today was another great day. Woke up had my shake and pills with my 32 oz of water. For lunch I got kinda in a rush was trying to get out the door to go meet my 2 older nieces at the bus stop so they wouldnt get to their house before me and I made my shake to go. Well I pulled a blonde moment, I have been putting my multivitamin in my shake and crushing it up so its one less pill to swallow at breakfast and lunch, and I threw one in my shake and was in such a rush I couldnt remember if I had or not so just to be safe because I didnt want to miss it I threw another one in. LOL, so I ended up with 2 multivitamins in one meal.

"C" called me this afternoon doing another checkup call and I asked her if it was bad if I did that with the two vitamins and she said no and was like it will just make your pee even more bright yellow. And speaking of pee, yes I know, mine has been like neon yellow the past few days. Quite interesting, never seen anything like it.

So I have definitely learned my lesson and wont go more than four hours ever again between meals. We had our womens monthly get together at our church tonight and I didnt have time to make dinner before we left which was right at my four hour mark. We didnt get home until 830 and didnt have dinner until 9 which was 7 hours between meals and it was bad. I dont think I have ever felt so hungry and my stomach hurt to the point I had almost lost all of my appetite. Note to self, dont do that again. Other than that everything here is going good. I am excited to start my couch to 5k next week and I am so proud of myself for sticking with this and getting up and making sure that I excercise every morning which is something that I havent ever done this many days on my own but it helps that I feel a little accountable to our roomie who is doing this with me. I know she is excercising to I make sure I am doing it too.


Personal reflections for today: I have been feeling a lot of fear today. Fear of failing yet again. I am so afraid that this isnt going to work and I am trying to get over it. Even right now I think about did I over do dinner which I know I didnt. I stayed right within my portions and I was fine. I think this fear comes from failing so many times before that every other attempt I have ever made has failed. I dont think I could handle failing this again. I know really at this point I can only fail myself because I am setting high expectations. I am wanting to see the same weight loss as "A" (roomie) in the first week. I think that I will feel like I failed if I dont lose as much as her or more in the first week. I know thats ridiculous because I know that at this point any weight loss is good, but I want the big numbers. I would love to lose at least 15 lbs this first week. I know thats a lot but this was a radical lifestyle change. I know that I will succeed and I know I am sticking with this until I beat this battle in my head.

A little discouraged...

I know 2 days in not good but it's not the change that has me discouraged. I was talking to someone that at one point in my life I was extremely close too. In fact thought we would remain close the rest of our lives. However our life plans have taken us different ways and there is nothing bad about either way she is following what God has planned for her and I am following Gods plan for me. She recently lost 170 lbs for which I was so proud of her. I know she cut a lot out of her life although not really sure what as she hasn't said. Anyways I am so excited about this and have always found her to be an amazing source of encouragement especially when I needed she just seemed to know. So I start telling her about what I am doing differently and she is like well I just lost this weight all by myself and have been maintaining it for 5 months, which I find incredible but it just felt like a slap in the face. As if the fact that I am turning to this choice of lifestyle that it is not as good as doing it solo. I know that I shouldn't feel that way but for someone so close to me for such a long time to blow off the fact that I am finally taking control of this area of my life and seeking help that I shouldn't be as proud of my decision or that it isn't as good as what she did by herself. It really was hurtful. I couldn't believe it. I know that I have a long journey ahead of me but I am willing to do it.

Another note this journey has really made me reflective. I started reading today "Craving God" it's a 21 day devotional that goes along with the book "Made to Crave" by Lysa Terkeurst. I haven't read made to crave but I might have to once I finish this devotional book it is really good and I am wanting to learn to depend more on God and crave Him more in my life vs food.

I am also contemplating starting the couch to 5k in 9 weeks next week to kinda up the ante with this and it will also help me with training for a run hopefully next year. I am going to take I think about 18 weeks as I am starting as very very inactive over the past year and 1/2 to running 3x a week is going to be a big difference. Hopefully with the cooler weather it will be even more enjoyable to do it.